If any of you have read the past couple of short fiction pieces I posted and thought, “This dude is really weird,” well, the foundation for that goes back well into my primary grade years. My mom recently gave me a box of things she had saved from elementary school. Included in that was a story I had written in fourth grade titled “A City Slicker in Texas.” It was a relatively normal story if not a little quirky. However, over the weekend, Jordan Tekulve, a good friend of mine, sent me a copy of a story I wrote in sixth grade titled “Zordan and His Lover: A Classical Romance.” Oh boy. There were many times that I simply laughed out loud as I read it. It must have actually been for a class grade because there are teacher comments from Mrs. O’Brien included at the bottom.
As a teacher now, I think back to how she must have felt as she read it. Her comments were “Interesting opening paragraph! Your story is unique, different from the others. Great Title!” Again, from a teacher’s perspective, when you don’t know what else to say about a student’s work but don’t want to hurt his feelings, you say it is interesting, unique, and different. I’m laughing at my desk as I write this imagining her reading it and trying to find words to describe it.
Here are the pictures of the story. As you read, please remember that I was in sixth grade when I wrote it and don’t judge too harshly. I was a weird kid. I’ll share my thoughts on it afterwards.
My first reaction is to notice all the grammar and punctuation mistakes. I’m hoping that there are actually many more periods in between the sentences than what I’m seeing and that it’s simply a matter of photo quality that I can’t see them.
My second thought is that the title is very misleading. The story is neither classical nor truly a romance. I guess I tried to pull the old bait and switch on Mrs. O’Brien to get her interested.
My third thought is that the ending is very abrupt. Maybe there was a maximum word count that I had to stay under and needed to cut it off that way…at least I hope so.
I also read that the story is set in 2021. I wrote this in 1999. It’s funny how looking back, I thought that 2021 was sooooo far in the distance future. Now it is three years away. I was right about hoverboards though…kind of.
Reading this also brings back a flood of memories in regards to the context of it. I believe that the protagonist, Zordan, is actually based on Jordan Tekulve. I don’t remember who his love interest was at the time. I’m trying to read into the name I chose, Kristin F. Uller, to remember. I don’t remember a Kristen Fuller. If anyone reading this, (Jordan cough cough) can shed any light, I would appreciate it. I believe that I gave it to him to keep because he was the main character. I remember that Matthias Luff is actually Matt Huff. It’s funny because he actually did end up in the armed forces. I am not entirely sure which branch and do not want to insult him by saying the wrong one.
Well, there’s some insight into the mind of 6th grade Erik Steidl. Hope you guys enjoy it.